Monday, November 21, 2011

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Okay this is a line from the poem "I hope I give a good convincing thank-you to someone before I die"-

"I want to offer to help someone with his/her groceries then throw the groceries on the ground and bend myself into a crab-like stance, hissing at the person to make him/her think I feel threatened..."

Saturday, November 19, 2011


Look! My first stop motion cartoon. This was just sort of a trial run.

Friday, November 18, 2011


This video taught me about animals, I seriously thought that bears sat on lillie pads.
I feel dirty watching Spongebob at night.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Duggar kid math. There are twenty of these fuckers, if all twenty have another twenty kids, then there will be 400 of these THINGS walking around.






this is the song that made me fall in love with horse the band.

Im not sure how, but these and terrorism are mos def related.

Im reading this right now, its a collection of poems by Sam Pink. Here's an excerpt called Four Apologies:

"This is an apology to my roommate. You're right, I should've asked you if you wanted an "arctic adventure". And I should've explained that an "arctic adventure" is when I dump a bunch of snow on you while you're sleeping. But we need to resolve this. Because someone needs to cook dinner for you and then not hear the words "thank you" even though they're so easy to say.

This is an apology to Superman: Superman, I am sorry for shitting on a likeness of you when I was in kindergarten. I didn't know I had the flu. If I had known, I would've worn my striped underwear. But we have to move on. You mean too much to me.

This is an apology to my bathroom floormat. I am sorry. I didn't known that I'd become too destroyed to want to leave my apartment and wash you. If it's okay with you, I think I will fold you twice but like kind of sloppy and then put you behind the toilet and forget about you.

This is an apology to that cat I saw smashed in the road. I couldn't remember how to do cpr to a cat. Plus I didn't want to have to dodge cars."
When filling out job applications, you may encounter such stupid shit.





No one actually ever asks babies their opinion.

ps3 owners dont do stupid shit like this, jus sayin.

gotta keep those batteries fresh, I guess?

just her, the open road, and her hate machine.

WOAH WOAH WOAH.

uhhh....

I feel like anything with the word 'junior' in it, shouldnt be a food and liquor.

I had nightmares about this pizza...

straight up mile of port-a-potties.

Super secret sticker money attack.

Spencer Sotelo of Periphery hitting an invisible wall. If I remember correctly, I took this pic at Fubar in STL.

This might be one of my favorite documentaries of all time. It makes working in a parking lot seem insanely philosophical.

Saturday, November 5, 2011


I just finished this book. Makes me feel less insane about thoughts while at work. Here's an excerpt: 


"Because his eyebrows are perfect shapes--you think. Because he's friendly, and really understanding. Because he handled disappointment well. Not getting a new vacuum might cripple someone else. Send them into a crippling vertigo of despair. Not him though. His corduroy pants shield him from the crippling vertigo of despair."

Friday, November 4, 2011


There are only two places Ive seen armadillos; the zoo and dead in the road. Therefore, they must live in the road.

LORD OF THE LAND...aka apartment buildings.

Yeah this is your fifth studio album, I dont think youre selling crack anymore. Nice try, guy.

Completely insane.

Whoa, what a transformation.

No. Gag. Reflex.